Today has been an emotional, exhausting, and wonderful day. Chris and I left Trafton with his second family today (thank you, Emenhisers!) and traveled to Spartanburg for an adoption seminar. It was organized by America World Adoption; it was relatively small but powerful.
This morning, as I drank my crack (coffee), I read a devotion entitled "I know it's what I'm supposed to do, but..."
Mistake? I don't think so. It was all about how God speaks to us and we are to respond. We are to remain faithful to him and follow through when he nudges us forward.
As we drove, Chris and I talked about words. I am not shy about sharing personal thoughts with those I love. One reason: I like to profess things out loud. For instance, saying "We feel like we are supposed to adopt" is a public declaration of sorts. Until now, I was fearful of public opinion; I was scared someone would tell me I was a nut or stupid. I have recently realized that I don't really care if someone disagrees with us adopting or thinks it is a foolish move. In a way, we are asking those around us to hold us accountable. By telling others that we feel this calling, we are allowing ourselves to be questioned about it later. This is good for me- it keeps me focused. I'm NOT saying that we are to do everything we say we are going to do and do it perfectly. Rather, if GOD calls us to do something, we are to obey and act. By telling others, it becomes real. (Or it makes me feel like an idiot.)
So, back to the day. After arriving at the seminar, they started a video presentation. One of the verses was Proverbs 18:21: The tongue has the power of life and death. I almost laughed out loud, as we had JUST been talking about words and professing things out loud. Indeed, our tongue can hurt or help others. But it can also set us up for the future. Once I speak something, it's out there. Once I declare that God has spoken and I am following, I better do it.
For Chris, there were other words that hit him hardest. One of the speakers was a lady who was in the process of adopting. They had four boys of their own (she needs a medal) and they are getting ready to adopt from China. She openly explained that they were living in a way that didn't glorify God financially; they were not giving what they could to others. She told us that she read Crazy Love by Francis Chan (I LITERALLY slapped Chris at this point and squealed! This is one of my most favorite books in the world!) and it changed her life. Join the club, sister.
She said she realized "God doesn't bless us to keep the blessings all to ourselves. We are to give them away to others". Chris was hit hard by this. He told me later that those words made him SURE that this was our path. We may not have oodles of money put away, but we are given so much by our Lord. If we feel this calling, we are to respond. It is our responsibility.
Another couple spoke and let me tell you: this wife made me feel at ease. So I'm NOT crazy! And it IS possible! She was from Columbia originally (and a former second grade teacher) and her husband was from Rock Hill. They had their second little girl and she was 11 weeks old when this mommy heard God's whispers. She admitted that she wondered if she was crazy. But they started the paperwork and they are waiting on their little girl to come home now. When they asked me about countries that we were interested in, I professed to them, "I want a rainbow family!" Yeah, this is one of those times that I could potentially feel like an idiot. Instead of laughing, the husband shook his head, pointed to his wife, and said "Y'all need to hang out". Ha! She agreed with me that she too had always been interested in having a colorful family :)
God gave us a chance to spend time with brothers and sisters today. We were encouraged by their stories and it made my heart truly happy to know that there are other mamas out there feeling this way. Aside from wonderful fellowship, God used these folks to challenge us. This IS possible and it IS my plan for you.
These verses, from The Message, make me smile and gulp at the same time:
Rescue the perishing;
don't hesitate to step in and help.
If you say, "Hey, that's none of my business,"
will that get you off the hook?
Someone is watching you closely, you know—
Someone not impressed with weak excuses.
(Proverbs 24:12)
Lord, I am tired of excuses. I am tired of living safely and comfortably. I'm not saying that I'm going to sell our house and give all of our belongings away- although that is awesome if someone can do it. Instead, I am tired of my response to when God speaks....
Chris won't like that idea, God. I don't think I'll mention it to him.
Umm, I'm a public school teacher, God. Chris is a firefighter. We're not exactly millionaires.
We won't have enough bedrooms in our house if we adopt, God! It won't leave any bedrooms for guests.
People will think we're being careless or silly.
Okay, fine Lord. We'll adopt, but the child needs to be a certain age or from the country that WE choose. Oh, and maybe some minor special needs but nothing that takes us out of our comfort zone. 'Kay? Thanks.
The reality? He laughs at my excuses and my objections, knowing that He will get His way in the end. I cherish the baby growing inside me, and I worry about when we'll be able to adopt a child. He knows the timing and exactly how it will play out. He already knows exactly what child (children??) are going to share our home with us. They are going to be unbelievably beautiful and perfect in our eyes, and they are going to absolutely steal our hearts.
Saturday, March 24, 2012
Thursday, March 15, 2012
Change of plan
For those of you who don't know yet, God has given us a second little blessing that is due in October! It was not a total surprise, as we had JUST made the decision to try. We sure didn't think it would happen as quickly as it did though. I am thrilled to pieces and cannot wait to hold this little bundle, but I also felt a fraction of sadness when God confirmed the pregnancy. I realize that sounds horrible, but MY plan was in the works and I was disappointed that it was being interrupted. Let me explain.
Chris and I have recently decided that God wants our family to adopt. This has been a long and twisted road....we have vacillated between foster care and adoption. My husband was not interested in adoption at first. He actually told me that I wouldn't mention it for a couple of months and he would think it was over. Then I'd bring it up again and he'd think "Crap, she didn't forget." Ha! He should know better than that.
Finally, he compromised and told me that we could look into foster care instead. I naively thought this might satisfy God's plan for our family and it would be good enough for my heart. Big negative. We went to an informational meeting and a few days later, I knew it was not right. Please don't get me wrong: I think foster care is a wonderful way to provide love and support for kids who need it. But I would never be able to cut the heartstrings and sever a bond that I have made with a child. I would not be able to give them up easily. I confessed my feelings to Chris and he AGREED. He said that adoption was the way to go for our family. I think I about fell over.
Long story short, we have accepted and embraced the idea of God growing our family- by any means that He chooses :) We had actually connected with an agency and begun some of the paperwork involved in adoption. I had searched some of the available children online. (Note to prospective adoptive mommies: do not do this...big mistake.) One little boy's face appears in my mind at least once a day now, but I know that he cannot be ours right now. In the future? Maybe. But the thought of any child being possibly two years older by the time they come home to us is tortuous.
Thus.....I am celebrating and rejoicing at this new baby inside me! What a blessing. But, I am mourning the absence of what I thought was coming sooner. I feel like I am neglecting our other child- whoever and wherever he may be.
But- as always- God reminds me that HIS plan is perfect. His timing is what matters. He will grow and love on my babies- both near and far away.
Chris and I have recently decided that God wants our family to adopt. This has been a long and twisted road....we have vacillated between foster care and adoption. My husband was not interested in adoption at first. He actually told me that I wouldn't mention it for a couple of months and he would think it was over. Then I'd bring it up again and he'd think "Crap, she didn't forget." Ha! He should know better than that.
Finally, he compromised and told me that we could look into foster care instead. I naively thought this might satisfy God's plan for our family and it would be good enough for my heart. Big negative. We went to an informational meeting and a few days later, I knew it was not right. Please don't get me wrong: I think foster care is a wonderful way to provide love and support for kids who need it. But I would never be able to cut the heartstrings and sever a bond that I have made with a child. I would not be able to give them up easily. I confessed my feelings to Chris and he AGREED. He said that adoption was the way to go for our family. I think I about fell over.
Long story short, we have accepted and embraced the idea of God growing our family- by any means that He chooses :) We had actually connected with an agency and begun some of the paperwork involved in adoption. I had searched some of the available children online. (Note to prospective adoptive mommies: do not do this...big mistake.) One little boy's face appears in my mind at least once a day now, but I know that he cannot be ours right now. In the future? Maybe. But the thought of any child being possibly two years older by the time they come home to us is tortuous.
Thus.....I am celebrating and rejoicing at this new baby inside me! What a blessing. But, I am mourning the absence of what I thought was coming sooner. I feel like I am neglecting our other child- whoever and wherever he may be.
But- as always- God reminds me that HIS plan is perfect. His timing is what matters. He will grow and love on my babies- both near and far away.
Tuesday, March 13, 2012
Legacy
I want to leave a legacy
How will they remember me?
Did I choose to love?
Did I point to You enough
To make a mark on things?
I want to leave an offering
A child of mercy and grace
Who blessed Your name unapologetically
And leave that kind of legacy
(Nicole Nordeman)
How will they remember me?
Did I choose to love?
Did I point to You enough
To make a mark on things?
I want to leave an offering
A child of mercy and grace
Who blessed Your name unapologetically
And leave that kind of legacy
(Nicole Nordeman)
I know that Chris misses his daddy terribly. There are times when Trafton will do something and we'll both comment on how we wish that Reg could see him. Trafton is funny, loving, and incredibly stubborn....those traits did not arrive out of nowhere. He inherited those from his daddy and grandpa! (Maybe mama too??)
My little boy is also not afraid to get dirty and he loves to be outside.Chris grew up farming; he tells me that he's been driving a tractor since he was in elementary school. I like to imagine him as a little boy. Rambuncous but respectful; silly but hardworking. Reg allowed them to be boys, but he also made Chris and his 2 brothers tow the line. Saturdays were for work; the boys were expected to pitch in and not complain about it. Adults were respected and help was given when needed. This has followed Chris into adulthood. The man can whip up a piece of furniture if he wants to....seriously. Right now, we have a huge entertainment stand being built in our garage. He built our son's crib. And I have to say, they are nearly perfectly. He doesn't skimp on the details. Reg instilled knowledge in his sons- knowledge of how to build houses and how to make a home. He taught them things that I will never know. (I'm still amazed when we drive down highways and backroads. Chris can name every crop that is planted while we're passing them, just by glancing out the window.)
At times, I complain that it takes him forever to finish certain projects, but he will get it done. And the reason it takes him time to finish things? He works 4 different jobs: firefighter, construction/carpenter/electrician/mechanic, daddy, and husband. When I ask for his time, I get it. When I want his attention, I get it. Same goes for our son. He is attentive and loving with our child. He is dedicated to our family, and we've even had outsiders comment on his commitment. He came along to every single doctor's appointment when I was pregnant with T. Stayed in the room for exams and everything...now THAT is love. Specially when there are tears flowing (mine and my midwife's) and uncomfortable questions are being asked. That man takes it like a champ and jumps in on the conversation.
Reg, Joy, and their 3 boys went to church virtually every Sunday. Christopher remembers being on vacation and asking his daddy if they could skip church. When told no, Chris continued, "But dad! We're on vacation!" Reg's response? "God doesn't take a vacation. So neither do we." I love my husband's faith. It's long-standing and firm. He prays about things and gets our family to church to worship.
Most of all, Reg raised a remarkably LOYAL son in Christopher. Of course, I think all three brothers are wonderful. But I get to see and live inside of Chris' world each day. At our rehersal dinner, I spoke about his loyalty using an example from our early dating days. When I met Chris, I was on a rollercoaster. Didn't quite know who I was. I had the basics down (knew God, had a job, loved my family) but I was still searching for contentment with myself. Without getting into too many details, we'll just say I was a hot mess.
Early in our relationship, Chris came over one afternoon to find me upset and frazzled. I told him that I had some issues going on. I offered him an out by telling him that he didn't have to remain in the relationship if it was too much for him. Do you know what my hot, caring, future husband said to me?
"Baby," (said in a gruff, redneck accent) "How do you know God didn't put me here to go through this with you?"
That was it for me. I knew I was going to marry him. His love and loyalty were irresistible.
If Reg were alive today, I would tell him to rejoice in his family. He shaped and molded 3 strong sons. He has grandsons that are indescribably precious. And he was lucky enough to be married to one of the most godly women that I know. I hope that Chris and I will leave such a legacy after we're gone. I hope that God will smile at us and say, "Well done, good and faithful one."
Tuesday, February 14, 2012
Happy Heart
Happy Valentine's Day!
Today has special meaning for so many reasons: my mother AND my mother-in-law share today as their birthday!
We also told our parents two years ago (on Valentine's Day) that we were pregnant with T.
Last, but certainly not least, I get to celebrate loving my husband, sweet boy, family, dogs, and friends on this special day.
We become so caught up and distracted by day-to-day life, and it's nice to spend this day focusing on love and mushy stuff. Wouldn't it be amazing if we could all focus on showing others that we care throughout the other 364 days of the year??
I read something on the internet last night entitled "The Top Ten Worst Valentine Gifts". Number one? Bouquet of red roses. However, they were quick to tell readers that an assorted bouquet is more appropriate. And if your honey picks out the flowers himself?? Plus one point.
Score one for Christopher :)
Sweet, right? Well, scroll on down and check out the heartfelt card that he also gave me.
Um, yeah. For those of you who don't know him well, this is pretty typical. Heartfelt and sweet, and a little bit red. The way I like it :)
I saw something that described Jesus' sacrifice for us as the ultimate valentine. Amen, I thought. I love the idea of doing something for someone else or serving others on this special day and every other day. I have to brag about one of my dearest friends....
Instead of spending a night at home, she and her small group from church baked cupcakes and took them backstage to a strip club. Yep, you read that right. They took valentines and treats to the ladies who worked at the club. She emailed me and asked me to pray for the night; she was nervous about standing awkwardly nearby while "naked women were flying around" (those were her words... love her). The point of their outing was to show these women that they are loved, no matter what their past/present/future may look like. To show them that Jesus will take anyone and make them shine. What a blessing- my sweet friend stepped out of her comfort zone (waaaaaay out) to feed, encourage, and smile at these women who quite possibly feel used, objectified, and looked down upon.
Makes me think of the Samaritan woman in John 4....she meets Jesus at a well and does not realize who He is. He asks her for water and she cannot believe that He is speaking to her. She later confesses to him in conversation that she does not have a husband. I love His response:
That's nicely put: 'I have no husband.' You've had five husbands, and the man you're living with now isn't even your husband. You spoke the truth there, sure enough.
Ha! He is all-knowing AND has a great sense of humor. What happens next is amazing: He confesses to her that He is the Messiah. He uses this woman, despite others perceiving her as unworthy. He doesn't care about her past. A KING shares something huge with her and allows her to share with her friends and neighbors. What an honor.
Today has special meaning for so many reasons: my mother AND my mother-in-law share today as their birthday!
We become so caught up and distracted by day-to-day life, and it's nice to spend this day focusing on love and mushy stuff. Wouldn't it be amazing if we could all focus on showing others that we care throughout the other 364 days of the year??
I read something on the internet last night entitled "The Top Ten Worst Valentine Gifts". Number one? Bouquet of red roses. However, they were quick to tell readers that an assorted bouquet is more appropriate. And if your honey picks out the flowers himself?? Plus one point.
Score one for Christopher :)
Sweet, right? Well, scroll on down and check out the heartfelt card that he also gave me.
I saw something that described Jesus' sacrifice for us as the ultimate valentine. Amen, I thought. I love the idea of doing something for someone else or serving others on this special day and every other day. I have to brag about one of my dearest friends....
Instead of spending a night at home, she and her small group from church baked cupcakes and took them backstage to a strip club. Yep, you read that right. They took valentines and treats to the ladies who worked at the club. She emailed me and asked me to pray for the night; she was nervous about standing awkwardly nearby while "naked women were flying around" (those were her words... love her). The point of their outing was to show these women that they are loved, no matter what their past/present/future may look like. To show them that Jesus will take anyone and make them shine. What a blessing- my sweet friend stepped out of her comfort zone (waaaaaay out) to feed, encourage, and smile at these women who quite possibly feel used, objectified, and looked down upon.
Makes me think of the Samaritan woman in John 4....she meets Jesus at a well and does not realize who He is. He asks her for water and she cannot believe that He is speaking to her. She later confesses to him in conversation that she does not have a husband. I love His response:
That's nicely put: 'I have no husband.' You've had five husbands, and the man you're living with now isn't even your husband. You spoke the truth there, sure enough.
Ha! He is all-knowing AND has a great sense of humor. What happens next is amazing: He confesses to her that He is the Messiah. He uses this woman, despite others perceiving her as unworthy. He doesn't care about her past. A KING shares something huge with her and allows her to share with her friends and neighbors. What an honor.
Saturday, February 4, 2012
Adventures in Kindergarten
What an experience I'm having in kindergarten this year! I love it! And not just in an I-like-my-job kind of way...I feel like I'm really making a difference in the lives of these little souls. I told someone the other day that I'd like to write a book about all the funny things they say, but I would literally be writing things down all day long. They are true entertainers and they don't even know it! Here are a few of my favorites:
In the beginning of the year, we talk alot about rules and how we treat our friends. We come up with classroom rules together. The last one on our list this year, number 6, is "No whining". This is hard for all of us at times, but particularly hard for five and six year olds. One day, as one little girl was whining about something, a little boy shouted out, "Number six! No whining!" I didn't have to say a word :)
Another thing we do at the start of the school year is draw our families and talk about them. One particular boy was coloring and as I sat at his table, he said "my momma don't love me". I laughed and told him that of course his mom loves him. He shook his head and continued without even looking up, "Uh-Uh. She whips me". Knowing this particular mother, I explained that she wanted to teach him right and wrong and that shows that she loves him. Still coloring, he responded: "Well...you should see the belt. Umph!" and issued a loud grunt :)
During learning center time, one of my sweet girls came to me for help. Her center involved looking at a picture of something that is spelled with 3 letters. Her job is to spell the word. She held up a picture of a bathtub and asked me, "Is this how you spell 'bath?" On her paper: B A F.
Lately, we've been learning about different sounds like SH, CH, WH and PH. When I asked the kids to name some words that start with 'WH', one little friend eagerly raised his hand. "Whooping! My momma says that I need one of those." Let me tell you- his momma is right. This same little friend then thought it would be fun to act out a whooping by slapping ME on the backside. I'm not sure who it was more disturbing for- me or him.
We do calendar books each morning. On one page of the book, we make a tally mark. At the bottom of the page, there are several hands to count the days also. After we make a tally mark, we color in a finger. (I'm sure some of you can guess where this one's going.) Today when we colored in the middle finger, I heard one or two snickers. (Sad but true- some of them already associate that finger with something bad.) One of my little boys called out, "That's not your LOVE GOD finger".
Yesterday, as we walked down the hallway to leave, one of my little ones told me that he liked my hair. I thanked him and another little boy (the same one who knows all about his different fingers) told me "Mrs. Cranford, I love your body". Dang- I could get used to this. My husband could learn a thing or two from these boys :)
One of my very favorite things about kindergarten is their level of excitement. Having taught second grade for many years, it's a very different experience. Second graders have been there, done that. To kindergarten students, everything is new. For many of them, it's the first time they have walked in line, seen a smartboard, or listened to a firefighter talk about his job. We ran out of tissues one day and I said to a small group, "Let's get a new box of tissues out!" as I grabbed a colorful box. I kid you not: each child grinned and shouted "yeah!" I think I even got a fist-pump out of one little boy :)
At the end of each day, we line up before we are dismissed over the intercom. I am usually wiped out, so I'll sit on the table and chat with them while they are in line. Almost every day, one or two will come over and hug me. When their friends catch on, they join in too. After a few seconds, I am literally smushed by about 10 kids. What a blessing!
I am loving this year...watching them grow is amazing.
In the beginning of the year, we talk alot about rules and how we treat our friends. We come up with classroom rules together. The last one on our list this year, number 6, is "No whining". This is hard for all of us at times, but particularly hard for five and six year olds. One day, as one little girl was whining about something, a little boy shouted out, "Number six! No whining!" I didn't have to say a word :)
Another thing we do at the start of the school year is draw our families and talk about them. One particular boy was coloring and as I sat at his table, he said "my momma don't love me". I laughed and told him that of course his mom loves him. He shook his head and continued without even looking up, "Uh-Uh. She whips me". Knowing this particular mother, I explained that she wanted to teach him right and wrong and that shows that she loves him. Still coloring, he responded: "Well...you should see the belt. Umph!" and issued a loud grunt :)
During learning center time, one of my sweet girls came to me for help. Her center involved looking at a picture of something that is spelled with 3 letters. Her job is to spell the word. She held up a picture of a bathtub and asked me, "Is this how you spell 'bath?" On her paper: B A F.
Lately, we've been learning about different sounds like SH, CH, WH and PH. When I asked the kids to name some words that start with 'WH', one little friend eagerly raised his hand. "Whooping! My momma says that I need one of those." Let me tell you- his momma is right. This same little friend then thought it would be fun to act out a whooping by slapping ME on the backside. I'm not sure who it was more disturbing for- me or him.
We do calendar books each morning. On one page of the book, we make a tally mark. At the bottom of the page, there are several hands to count the days also. After we make a tally mark, we color in a finger. (I'm sure some of you can guess where this one's going.) Today when we colored in the middle finger, I heard one or two snickers. (Sad but true- some of them already associate that finger with something bad.) One of my little boys called out, "That's not your LOVE GOD finger".
Yesterday, as we walked down the hallway to leave, one of my little ones told me that he liked my hair. I thanked him and another little boy (the same one who knows all about his different fingers) told me "Mrs. Cranford, I love your body". Dang- I could get used to this. My husband could learn a thing or two from these boys :)
One of my very favorite things about kindergarten is their level of excitement. Having taught second grade for many years, it's a very different experience. Second graders have been there, done that. To kindergarten students, everything is new. For many of them, it's the first time they have walked in line, seen a smartboard, or listened to a firefighter talk about his job. We ran out of tissues one day and I said to a small group, "Let's get a new box of tissues out!" as I grabbed a colorful box. I kid you not: each child grinned and shouted "yeah!" I think I even got a fist-pump out of one little boy :)
At the end of each day, we line up before we are dismissed over the intercom. I am usually wiped out, so I'll sit on the table and chat with them while they are in line. Almost every day, one or two will come over and hug me. When their friends catch on, they join in too. After a few seconds, I am literally smushed by about 10 kids. What a blessing!
Wednesday, February 1, 2012
2 Cor. 5:17
Anyone in Christ is a new creation
The old has gone, the new has come.
(2 Corinthians 5:17)
PRAISE THE LORD for this promise. I learned this verse in high school, and I didn't realize it would carry me into adulthood. His promises have a way of sticking with us, I guess :)
I distinctly remember the immense guilt that set in when I learned what Jesus did. My mind was reeling with all that I had committed in fifteen years, all that had hurt my parents. I called them from camp and cried more than once, asking them to forgive me for all that I had done to bruise their hearts.
This is not God's purpose in exposing us to Jesus; He doesn't want to make us feel horribly guilty and beat ourselves up. Although this was my initial reaction, I later realized that He was simply trying to show me how deep His love is. He is willing to sacrifice His most precious possession for mankind...even for a lousy sinner like myself.
I love to tell people about my past. I get different reactions....some people laugh, some folks share stories with me from their own crazy days, and some don't believe me.Y'all- I was messed up. Not serving anyone but myself and ignoring the big picture. I don't wanna get into specifics because we all have our dark moments from the past. But I also don't want to share all that I've done because, frankly, some of it is embarrassing. Don't misunderstand: I am thankful for everything (well, mostly everything) that I have encountered or experienced. It helps me relate to other people. It helps me stop and think twice before judging someone. Thinking about my past helps me realize how far I've come and how God has blessed me with His ENDLESS forgiveness and mercy. He doesn't keep a list of my wrongdoings; He doesn't make a tally mark every time I hurt someone or do something that He doesn't like.
The old has gone, the new has come.
(2 Corinthians 5:17)
PRAISE THE LORD for this promise. I learned this verse in high school, and I didn't realize it would carry me into adulthood. His promises have a way of sticking with us, I guess :)
I distinctly remember the immense guilt that set in when I learned what Jesus did. My mind was reeling with all that I had committed in fifteen years, all that had hurt my parents. I called them from camp and cried more than once, asking them to forgive me for all that I had done to bruise their hearts.
This is not God's purpose in exposing us to Jesus; He doesn't want to make us feel horribly guilty and beat ourselves up. Although this was my initial reaction, I later realized that He was simply trying to show me how deep His love is. He is willing to sacrifice His most precious possession for mankind...even for a lousy sinner like myself.
I love to tell people about my past. I get different reactions....some people laugh, some folks share stories with me from their own crazy days, and some don't believe me.Y'all- I was messed up. Not serving anyone but myself and ignoring the big picture. I don't wanna get into specifics because we all have our dark moments from the past. But I also don't want to share all that I've done because, frankly, some of it is embarrassing. Don't misunderstand: I am thankful for everything (well, mostly everything) that I have encountered or experienced. It helps me relate to other people. It helps me stop and think twice before judging someone. Thinking about my past helps me realize how far I've come and how God has blessed me with His ENDLESS forgiveness and mercy. He doesn't keep a list of my wrongdoings; He doesn't make a tally mark every time I hurt someone or do something that He doesn't like.
The most amazing part?? It's not just high school and college that I am forgiven for. I am forgiven and cleansed EVERY DAY. If I ask Him to forgive me, He does so with a happy heart. He rejoices in the fact that I am bringing it to Him; I am bowing at His feet and acknowledging that I cannot live this life without Him. I fail miserably on my own. I need His Spirit. The scary part?? He asks us to extend the same grace and forgiveness to other people.
Thursday, January 19, 2012
Encouraged
He will have no fear of bad news; his heart is steadfast, trusting in the LORD. (Psalm 112:7)
For those of you who don't know me well, I am an anxious person. Okay, to be honest, I am ridiculously worried about ridiculous things. I let "what ifs" take over and I seem to think glass-half-empty thoughts quite often. It's hard to get ready in the morning and read this verse from Psalms on my bathroom mirror. Sometimes I feel confident that I will breeze through the day. Other days, I feel like I could puke from the sense of dread that sits in my tummy.
Today I had coffee with a friend of mine who I have not seen in a couple of years. God's wisdom is amazing. The way He knows what each of us is going through is awesome enough. The fact that He connects us with others who can relate? Or the way He puts folks in our lives at exactly the right time? It reminds me that He has me in the palm of His hand. Today I was able to listen to someone tell me about their life, and all the intensely wonderful things that God is doing. It was so inspiring. As I listened to her tell me all about their family's adventure, I realized that I am not the only person who dreams big and feels like crazy things are possible. More than that, crazy things are what God desires for us....Take risks, He tell us. Get UNcomfortable. Let go and I will steer.
I'll show up and take care of you as I promised and bring you back home. I know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for. (Jer. 29:11, The Message)
He will show up and take care of us. And then to top it off, He will bring us back HOME to His house one day. He has it all under control; it's all good. He will give us the future that we hope for- maybe not in the form of what we expected, but He will meet the desires of our heart one way or another.
Someone once called me "flighty" and it wore on my nerves. I immediately started to question myself. WAS I indeed someone who could not remain on one path? Or someone who could not make a decision and stick to it? I prefer to think that I am a follower. A follower of my Father God, that is. I go where He leads. I don't always go without questioning (or without whining, for that matter) but I try to listen to Him and follow. This may cause me to up and move in the middle of something, or it may cause me to change my mind. If this makes me flighty, then so be it. Spending time with this friend today made me realize that I'm not the only person who knows that with God, the impossible can indeed become a reality.
For those of you who don't know me well, I am an anxious person. Okay, to be honest, I am ridiculously worried about ridiculous things. I let "what ifs" take over and I seem to think glass-half-empty thoughts quite often. It's hard to get ready in the morning and read this verse from Psalms on my bathroom mirror. Sometimes I feel confident that I will breeze through the day. Other days, I feel like I could puke from the sense of dread that sits in my tummy.
Today I had coffee with a friend of mine who I have not seen in a couple of years. God's wisdom is amazing. The way He knows what each of us is going through is awesome enough. The fact that He connects us with others who can relate? Or the way He puts folks in our lives at exactly the right time? It reminds me that He has me in the palm of His hand. Today I was able to listen to someone tell me about their life, and all the intensely wonderful things that God is doing. It was so inspiring. As I listened to her tell me all about their family's adventure, I realized that I am not the only person who dreams big and feels like crazy things are possible. More than that, crazy things are what God desires for us....Take risks, He tell us. Get UNcomfortable. Let go and I will steer.
I'll show up and take care of you as I promised and bring you back home. I know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for. (Jer. 29:11, The Message)
He will show up and take care of us. And then to top it off, He will bring us back HOME to His house one day. He has it all under control; it's all good. He will give us the future that we hope for- maybe not in the form of what we expected, but He will meet the desires of our heart one way or another.
Someone once called me "flighty" and it wore on my nerves. I immediately started to question myself. WAS I indeed someone who could not remain on one path? Or someone who could not make a decision and stick to it? I prefer to think that I am a follower. A follower of my Father God, that is. I go where He leads. I don't always go without questioning (or without whining, for that matter) but I try to listen to Him and follow. This may cause me to up and move in the middle of something, or it may cause me to change my mind. If this makes me flighty, then so be it. Spending time with this friend today made me realize that I'm not the only person who knows that with God, the impossible can indeed become a reality.
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